Pre-Podcast
I knew when I was formulating ideas about the podcast that it would be a learning experience. I was going into it blind, as my mom never really mentioned anything about singing lullabies to me as a kid. I was actually quite excited to ask my mom about a part of my life that I will obviously never remember. I smiled thinking about the thought of her recalling memories of her as a young mom. My mind started racing with initial questions I wanted to ask my mom. In reality, I truly had no idea what to expect. My head suddenly started to feel heavy from thinking about all the questions I wanted to ask her, so I decided that I will just see where the conversation takes us. I knew I wanted to have her emphasize why she sang to me as a child. Did she think it was a bonding experience between a mother and her child? Did she believe that singing would somehow propel my development fast? These questions were marinating in my mind prior to my interview with my mom.
The night I was planning to record the podcast, I sheepishly went out to the kitchen where my mom was washing the dishes. I asked my mom with a quiver in my voice if I could do this podcast with her. As she rolled her eyes at me, my face began to burn with embarrassment. I knew she wouldn’t want to do it, but when I slowly peeled my eyes away from the floor back onto her face, she was smiling and said of course she’ll do it. My mom initially asked if she could do the lullaby podcast in Polish. I told her I preferred English, only because I don’t think my translation skills would cut it. I could tell she was reluctant, so I poured us both some chamomile tea to calm our nerves and warm our chests.
When I stiffly sat down for the interview with my mom, I could sense the awkward energy around us. My mom’s face turned slightly red as she began to get nervous. “Are you sure people are going to understand my accent?” she asked, and at that moment I knew why she was so reluctant to do this podcast with me. After several minutes of reassurance, we dove right in.
I was surprised to learn that my mom sang so much to me as a child, considering she never told me until now. I could sense her reminiscing on times she used to sing to me as a baby. I was completely wrong in thinking that my mom didn’t understand the impact that singing can have on a child. She seemed incredibly knowledgeable on the topic of lullabies, and throughout the interview talked about how she believed singing lullabies was important for a child’s development, as well as the relationship between the parent and child. I felt a laugh building up in my body when she mentioned that her favorite lullaby to sing to me was a Polish song called “Dwa Koty” which means “Two Cats.” We joked that her singing that song to me so often was why I’m such a cat person because I grew up absolutely loving cats and kittens, and I currently have three myself. I could sense my mom’s shyness slowly fade away as she recalled how much I loved her singing. I cracked a smile when she started detailing the experiences of her singing to me, no matter what my mood was or what I was doing. Her eyes sparkled in our living room lighting as she continued to express her experiences with singing lullabies.
Post-Podcast
By the end of my conversation, I was able to retain multiple answers as to why my mom sang to me as a kid. For her, lullabies meant so much more than a means to put a child to sleep. It was a way for her to bond to her newborn child, something she believed was essential to my development, and moreover an enjoyable experience for both of us. She turned to lullabies whether I was crying or laughing. My mom communicated to me that lullabies were a natural part of the incredibly challenging and wonderful journey of raising a child.
Talking to my mom was a really great experience, and by the end of the podcast we chatted even more about her experiences with singing to me as a kid. It seemed almost impossible that at first she was so reluctant to be interviewed, because she was smiling from ear to ear as she continued to recall stories of me as a baby. I hope that one day she can teach me some Polish lullabies that I can one day sing to my own children.
